Sparkling Lotus-land

resolving

This is a bed quilt that's been in a state of such slow progress that I've lost patience with the habit of putting it aside for long chunks of time.  The top was constructed many years (18) ago.  At the time I was in the middle of a very painful and difficult talk-therapy process related to the darkest parts of my childhood.

Being me, I did not want this necessary work to eclipse everything else that I knew to be true of how and where I was raised.  I have any number of authentically pleasant/sustaining memories from the same time passage.  So I started piecing simple star blocks to honor those memories.  The fabrics I used in the stars relate to particular events or ongoing activities.  The background fabrics remind me of gardens, furniture upholstery, or wallpaper that I especially loved.

Yesterday I worked on the couch with an intensity light.  Today's sunny weather allowed me to sit here in the alcove and work in all natural light.  Took these pictures of the way the quilt fell across my lap.  Right now it's draped over some cartons and Celeste seems to be claiming the area as a private retreat.   This suggests she must think this is meant to be her quilt; we'll have to share it!

The back is a gigantic nine patch that I've never quite got around to photographing.  Last winter I didn't work on this project at all but this year I'm determined to finish the quilting and get it bound.  This is a realistic goal especially if I stick to my intention to work on it for at least a half hour a day until it's finished.  Chances are good that, once I'm actually settled with the needle in my hand, I'll maintain a schedule of spending far more time with it but at least I've set a bare-minimum goal that seems fully do-able.

There are lots of crossroads in this quilt since I have added a lattice of ocean waves (to remind me of all the trips we took to Cape May) that are posted with sunflowers and honeybees.  It has a wide-range rainbow color scheme.  You can see a picture of the whole top here.  Yes, I posted that image back in 2006.  Like I said.  It's been very slow progress but now I'm ready to buckle down and get it done.

So.  There's one fully functioning resolution set ...

life line stitching

Yesterday I worked on the first layer of quilting for the crinkle quilt.  This step serves the purpose of creating texture and form from the crinkles.  Then I will do a bit of painting before adding batting and another layer of quilting.  The stitches will include a bit of beading, I think.



This mountain will really come to life during later stages.  For now it was important to form basic textures.  Enjoyed working with the Valdani variegated grey thread.  Was glad to test it before I plan how I'll work with it in the context of the project that actually lead to the thread's purchase.



This mountain fabric is printed with shadowy cayenne peppers.  I'm exploiting the black stems and quilting stitches to form longer and more overt lines.  I think that will help it look more like rocks and less like a whimsical landscape collage.  Paint should take this goal the rest of the way home.  Note that this collage inspiration was taken from a very vivid dream.  It seemed so important to me that I continued to explore its landscape in waking meditation.  The collage shows a fragment of something I "discovered" in the course of those meditations.



A large still lake choked with lotus plants.  On the far side of the lake I could see miles worth of beaches that were sacred to unknown People.  The way to the beach was perilous and in many ways impassable.  The beachfront foothills were painted and carved with layers of sacred symbols.  There was a singular pyramid made of polished marble.



The surest way to access the beach from the far side of the lake was over these vast pinnacles.  Many trails show that people came here on a regular if secretive basis.



My goal for today is to quilt the moon and sky beyond the mountains.  Am really enjoying the time I spend with this piece.  The finicky and time-consuming aspects are perfect for my left brain's problem solving mode.  It does help me to work through problems metaphorically; with images and colors that relate to the nature of whatever that work might involve on any given day.

Working with the crinkled fabric is quite satisfying at the Cool Project level, as well.  Am considering a small sample set of shiva paintsticks but think I can get the effects I seek by layering oil pastel with some lumiere.   Both things already exist in this workroom so perhaps I'll collect what's available and create a couple of samples ...   

Crinkle Experiment Cont'd

First off, I'd like to say how happy I am to understand what's always made some of my near and dear so happy about this day - TRUCK DAY - from a Red Sox point of view.  Also happy I feel an ability to BE happy.  Am appreciative of all the good thoughts, prayers, etc. sent my way based on the last entry.  Yesterday I didn't stitch so much as I shifted projects and set up everything I need to make next-step progress with them.  I focused on things of an I should really nature - specifically a few should-reallys that hadn't manifested. 


Have been neglecting my first Crinkle Quilt experiment.  It was fully dry a few weeks back.  Yesterday I got as far as pin-basting this piece to some flannel.  I'm going to need to quilt it for a while, and then see if what I'm envisioning is going to be viable, or if I'll have to switch some visionary tracks.  Am anxious to try another Crinkler but next time I'll definitely go with a single layer of fabric.  This piece was always two and sometime three or four layers.  That really lengthened the drying time and also caused uneven degrees of crinkling. 



I'll need to find ways to exploit or minimize that factor during the next stage of quilting.  I really enjoyed working with this piece yesterday.    Don't know when I'll have a chance to get on with the quilting but I think it can use some days of relaxing into the pinned structure I created.  Am glad to have chosen this piece for crinkle-tizing even if it was a bit of a problem child along the way.   Have already selected my next crinkle candidate as this is a process well worth serial exploration.

sunny morning snafus

Just completed a longer post that included a book review which I then carelessly keystroked into oblivioun.  Ack. Seems we've entered the pre-shadow phase for the coming retro merc cycle!

At the end of that post, this image made note of the fact that I am fully finished with the tumbler charm quilt.  On sunny days earlier in the week I sat in this alcove sewing the binding and tying off innumerable threads from the machine quilting.  Wasn't quite up for re-creating the book review but I did manage to take a few detail shots for this revised post.



Here are some pictures that show what I meant about the side edges following the angles of the tumbler.  Note I am already seeing a few places where the machine quilting is so unacceptable to me that I'm going to (at some point) rip it out and add glimmers of hand quilting, instead.



This quilt is single bed-sized.  Its early nineties coloration has been growing on me steadily.  At this point, I believe it makes a fine addition to this room.  It serves equally well as a yoga cool-down blanket and a kitty-cave hideout.  Have posted two different images on nichobella, along with some pictures of my late starting progress on this month's TIF venture.

here it comes ...

Just went out to the side porch and attempted to take some pictures of the falling snow.  They were unsuccessful so this has transmogrified into a quilt-oriented post.   Above is the center of a pieced back for my green and purple tumbler charm quilt.  I finished the piecing on Tuesday afternoon.  Yesterday afternoon I spent a few hours on machine quilting.  I hope to have the quilting completed, and be at the binding stage, by the end of this weekend.



Here's the completed back before I attached it to the quilt.  Even though it was a simple straightforward process, I managed to err a few times in relation to my original plan - once I completed the central portion I sewed the pieces I intended for the length's dimension along the lines that were meant for the width's measurement.  No matter.  This isn't the sort of quilt that's going to be hmmmm'd over and rigorously critiqued by a knowledgeable audience.  It's going to be loved within heavy rotation among those who have grown somewhat spoiled in terms of plenty of quilts made by yours truly.  But they really don't care about the details such as a sideways polar bear and directional fabric running on the vertical rather than horizontal axis.  They care only that it's colorful and cuddle-worthy.  Which it is on both count.



If you enlarge the image you can see my clumsy machine quilting.  Yet I'm well-satisfied with the endeavor.   Am making an effort to have a better (meaning less impatient and dismissive) attitude towards working with the machine and so I decided I would deviate from my normal habit of quick and dirty in-the-ditch or simple diamond quilting tendencies.  I chose to work with an ongoing doodle habit of mine of making wavy lines that feature alternative loops.

The quilting was actually fun once I developed a rhythm and stopped freaking out about how long it was taking me to fill the 34 inch square of psychedelic pointsetta fabric.  Not to mention how much thread I used.  This morning while I was out on a mail run I also nipped over to the sewing center for four more rolls of thread - two purple and two green.  I hope this will be enough to get me through the rest of the quilting and also the binding process.  I plan on attaching the entire binding by hand, because that's the way I'll have the greatest control as I learn what's involved with binding the triangular side edges of the quilt.  Have already prepared a mass of french bias binding for this endeavor.



My original plan to piece a binding from scraps was ... well, scrapped when I realized this intention was inherently a lot more thoughtful and hence time-consuming.  I further realized (for once ...) that this fact might prevent me from having the quilt completed in time for the holiday crush of guests.  So I opted to cruise the super-reduced sale fabs at the sewing center until I found the right candidate for the job.  It's one of those fabrics that makes certain personality types blurt out GOD that's ugly but I knew it would be a great candidate for the multiplicity of patterns on the front of the quilt.



The lady who cut the  fabric for me was visibly blanching as she did so.   But by now I'm sure it's clear to blog readers that I'm neither fearful nor snobbish where color is concerned.  More to the point, in this particular case, I was absolutely clear that once the fabric had been turned into binding, it would be rather perfect for the project at hand.  See what I mean?



Right after I made the binding, I pinned a length of it to the top to test my certainty and was quite  pleased with the results.  This test  is also what convinced me it would be well worth the time and effort involved  with hand-stitching the entire binding instead of doing the first part of that process by machine.   Yes it will take longer.  It will also save me untold  amounts of frustration and  thus greatly sweeten my learning curve.

This seems like the perfect activity as the snow falls about an hour ahead of the projected predictions.  It's coming down like it means business so I'm guessing we'll have the type of significant precipitation we've been led to expect.  All the native new englanders  I know are positively ecstatic at this prospect.  I, likewise, am delighted that it means I won't have to listen to everybody and their uncle kvetch about a green December.  It's a win-win  deal, in other words.  And that's always nice ...

lurching forward

Am having some trouble picking up the threads of my life now that Thanksgiving is a done deal.  What isn't done:  the garden beds still need to be mulched.  Jim said if worse comes to worst, he can do it all while I point imperiously from the window.  Don't really care to contemplate that particular worst and so I'm assuming I'll be able to deal with at least part of the chore.  Also not done:  I know about a dozen people who are moving this month.  I need to get their new addys and update my book.  And then, right on seasonal schedule, there are orders for the flower essence Handbook that need to be filled.



I quite consciously don't use this blog as a self-promotional aid but I must say there's an upside to self-publishing an oversized reference manual with a substantive price tag.  People don't tend to buy it unless they're fairly serious about flower medicine and/or vibrational healing.  That in turn means I tend to have very interesting conversations rather than simply "servicing the customer".  I always love thinking about the Handbook going off to live in some other green corner of the world.  I would say that three quarters of my book sales are for a special gift of some kind - to self or somebody near & dear.  This creates a wonderful energy flow that often plays a big part in the physical assemblage of each Handbook.

 

I do not have copies of this book lying around - each copy is printed as it's ordered.  This time of year, I've learned to bundle the printings in small batches so I'm not running back and forth several times a week.   That just wouldn't make sense even if I wasn't in a state of energetic recharge.  This morning is the first time in ten days when I felt grounded and focused steady enough to begin my day with a long journal entry.  Yesterday's trip for bird seed made it clear that I shouldn't be behind the wheel of a car.  While this is frustrating, it also simplifies things in terms of the tasks I attempt to complete, etc.

Despite my growing fondness for life without to-do lists, it seems likely that I'll need to synthesize the month of December with some kind of formalized task breakdown.  You can see evidence of one task I hope to complete - having more people in the house made it clear that we could do with one more bed quilt.  So I'm resolved to finish the charm tumbler that I resurrected in mid-October.  Before the virus hit, I prepared some bias French binding.  I then pinned part of the binding to the quilted top, as a way of encouraging myself to stick with it...

OF COURSE you know my original plan was to have this completed before the litmus test of Thanksgiving guests!  But I do have time to get a nice backing machine sewn.  Jury is still out on whether I'd prefer to partially machine stitch the binding or make the entire process a handworking study.  Have never applied a binding this way and always want to do it despite the extra time involved.  Or who am I kidding - maybe BECAUSE of the extra time...



I have made two trips into the cedar closet, gathering fabrics that might work on the back.  Need to make another visit as I think I would like to add some plaids.  Don't usually rely on this many flowers at once unless it's a fullout girly project.   Donkey lovers please note a final scrap from one of my favorite fabrics, fourth picture down...

ah yes - the unexpected

If you enlarge the image you'll see a few pinned spots that need hand sewing.  I've also decided I'm going to do a bit of embroidery on the completed groundcloth before it's submitted to the crinkling chamber.  This is hard to describe with words.  Just look at points in the patchwork where there are opportunities to 'smear' color in more vibrant ways with just a bit of easy stitching.   It has to be easy - and also a sturdy sort of stitch - in order to hold its own weight during the crinkling phase...hmm...so many things to consider as a new week begins.



The first holiday of The Busy Season is now behind us.  I ate enough to gain the better part of six pounds - yikes.  My metabolism is definitely not what it used to be!   But pie for breakfast three days in a row is worth this kind of wakeup call - pie for breakfast being such a lovely way to wake up, after all. It's also nice to have pie for lunch.  And as dessert after supper ...

This morning I wanted to sew the second panel, having completed a layout I liked before bed last night.  I did not want to get hung up on details, I just wanted to get the panel sewn.  When I'm in that kind of mood I frequently sew without my glasses  This works better for embroidery and other handwork than it works at the machine!  Now I have some places to patch.  Also?  I forgot to sew the patches to the muslin base!  This means I may be adding some machine stitching as well as the light embroidery.  Funny thing is - I wanted to add both those touches all along and then thought I was making things too complicated and multi-layered for a first effort.

Of course nothing ever looks the same once it is sewn - working with such tiny pieces means the cost of a few seam allowances further means finding a whole new scrap to add to the growing mosaic.  Without glasses I focused more on value than print specifics and color.  I think that will wind up being a good thing since there is such low contrast in the first panel.  So many different things to keep in mind - it is lucky I have plenty of scraps to play with and can make this a detailed, series-oriented experiment.  I'll be able to focus on different design elements but of course I started with color distribution.  Now I am thinking of lots of other ideas and how cool it would be to explore them with little pieces of some kind...

Below are the two more-or-less completed panels.  I want to fully finish both before I move on to making the third panel because that will make it easier to know if I'm going to chop and reassemble the panels.  If I think I will then that will factor into how I collage the third panel.  Et cetera.    Think I am going to call this piece Just Squint.

a new experiment

One of my private rituals for a long holiday weekend involves allowing myself to jump off some new cliff creatively.  Recently, while I was too sick to do anything, I spent a lot of time thinking about Nellie Durand's crinkle quilts. Last Wednesday I realized I'd done enough "thinking" to be fairly confident I had figured out a way to apply her basic crinkling and quilting techniques to my own style, rather than simply mimicking what I could de-construct of her assembling techniques.



In this workroom I keep a shallow and overflowing box of very small scraps. The pieces are just big enough to sing some measure of a larger cloth's medicine song, but not much bigger than that.  For a time I tried to gift this collection to somebody who made ATCs.  People kept refusing the offering - predicting a day that has yet to come ... the day I wake up with a burning desire to create ATCs of my own.  I know it's a righteous fool's act to say-never and yet, to date, an urge to make an ATC has never found me.

A few weeks back I started should really-ing myself about this box.  Should really sort through it by color.  Should really iron at least a handful of such pieces once they were sorted by color.  Should really just buckle down and try to make an ATC rather than nurturing further certainty that I won't enjoy the process.  So this post is all about getting to a place of two out of three.  There's been no sudden development of an ATC (or even the gleam of one in my eye) but after a few dips into the tiny scrap bin I found some things that got me from should-really to am-doing.



I am sewing the squares, strings and triangles to a muslin base.  Have prepared three of these bases - 14 x 7 inches.  Have not decided how I'll sew them together for the groundcloth to be crinkled.  But I do know that in place of Nellie's coffee cup as a crinkle containment unit, I'm going to use an old honey jar.



I may cut each rectangle in half or into three rectangles.  Then recombine.  Or I may like the way the three panels hang together.  Can't really have that level of planning in place until I have a better idea of what I'm working with coloration wise.



It's been very satisfying to work with tinier scraps - the weekend has contained surprises (of course) and some physical exhaustion due to the pain level of current neurological disturbance.  I am once again reluctant to work on any of my established stitching pieces in progress because the disturbance makes me clumsy and inherently less sharp at the mechanical and mental levels.  So it's definitely good to find something dependent on much broader strokes.

Creating some new fabric is only the first step of this process.  I have studied Nellie's gallery images and technical notes long enough to gain confidence that I can produce something from this endeavor.  Don't know WHAT yet but I am so happy to move forward in the first stages of manifestation...


Am really curious to see what happens to the colors on the other side of the crinkling process.  Hope to be ready for that by mid-week.  Have several ideas I'd like to develop - as usual...

Mindfulness

Did you know it takes longer to break a habit than to create a new one?  That's been on my mind lately because I decided to follow Jen's example and embrace Christine Kane's challenge to become complaint-free, whine-free, criticism-free and gossip-free for 35 days.  Tonight, as I was reading some ideas Christine posted about making this work, I noticed that Jen and I were upping the ante of the process because we've both been monitoring our inner monologue as well as the words we speak.  In the comments section of her blog, CK answered a question about that monologue - saying that, for now, such things were "just to be noticed".  But I'm going to go on counting my thought forms as a reason to start over from square one.  For one thing, that's what seems most authentically mindful to me.  More to the point, it's the best way to truly create a more positive mindset and successfully break negative habits of self-world relationship.

That said, it would be a whole lot easier to simply track what actually comes out of the mouth.  But I do think the interior landscape is a big part of the ultimate behavioral equation.  For that reason, I've also been tracking what I write in my journal.  On the list of habits to be eliminated, criticism is my own "favorite" demon of choice.  And I'm counting self-criticisms (which are often especially prevalent in my journal writing) as no-no's along with more overt forms of the same thing. 

It's a statement of fact rather than a complaint to make it clear that I do not like this personal habit or see any reason to justify it.  This issue has been on my mind for a couple of weeks now so I must have been subliminally hooked into the behavioral movement even before I read about it on Jen's blog.  Haven't visited Christine Kane's blog in a few months or I might have realized the collective mindset a bit sooner.   In addition to taking the concept of critical thinking skills way too literally, I sometimes find myself getting caught up in gossip and/or lazy* enough to  complain about things.  As for whining - well.  I think by now I've made it pretty clear how little use I have for that particular form of self-expression.  So far I've started over 7 or 8 times since last Thursday.  All but one of the times I had to begin afresh  because I said or thought something critical.  Once I complained, out loud, to my husband.

Originally I wasn't going to post about this until I'd made it through five consecutive complaint/whine/gossip/criticism free days.  The longest I've managed so far is two days.  I decided to post about it RIGHT NOW because I think making pubic acknowledgment of my intention is a good way of keeping myself honest about the process.   I feel absolutely positive this process is entirely possible in ways that speak of character refinement and self-improvement rather than repression or selective awareness.  Of course there are flower essences that can help to manifest the intention in ways that also re-inform the brain and general electrical system.

I do wonder what will happen to my fine intentions when/if Mike Lowell declares free agency and/or a certain ex-Yankee shows up at Fenway's third base in place of number 25.  Maybe - if the worst case scenario does come to pass - I'll take a few hours "away" before I start back at square one.  Because I am only human and so very far from perfect...

* I totally agree with Christine Kane's assertion that all of these very common human behavior mechanisms are a sign of supreme laziness - in thought form(s) and self-expression.  And personally I'd rather be lazy by having a pajama day with a good book and some vegan-friendly chocolate cake!

mysterious til the end ....

Looks like I'm up to some old school magic tricks, eh?   It's really just a matter of tracing a few varying sizes of circles on the china silk so I can make some yo-yos for my black sampler.   I took this picture about 8 days ago but it feels more like two months!  Haven't sewn the yo-yos into place yet.   Will talk more about this project tomorrow, over on Nichobella.

This is without question one of the most personally strange retro mercs I've experienced in quite awhile.  I'll spare readers most of the details but here's one weird twist of many in the past 24 hours or so.  Less than an hour ago I turned on my computer and the screen bloomed!  I'd had an intuition it would and that's why I turned on the machine in the first place.  But it still startled me when the screen worked!  The timing allowed me catch Tony before he left Amherst.  So there were no communication/traveling snafus and he was pleased to find himself with a free evening. 

OF COURSE this whole thing occurred while I'm in the middle of taking an on-line photoshop class! Before or after tonight's game, I'll need to print out the lesson I haven't been able to access any sooner.  Then maybe tomorrow I can begin to experiment with the previous lesson as well as this new one.  I've been dealing with the other bizarre happenstances in my world pretty well but this thing with the computer has truly tested me and forced some levels of growth that just reek of Mercury in trickster mode.  The creative frustration has been enormous but I've learned a ton about how I manage myself - how I can BE managed with this specific kind of frustration afoot. 

This morning, after I finished work tasks, I knew it was really important for me to stay occupied so I wouldn't clock watch in anticipation of Tony's arrival.   Or worry about what would occur if he couldn't actually solve the problem.  I didn't want my whole day to be about waiting to re-connect with this machine or fearing that I wouldn't have the opportunity!  So I lost myself in clearing-out the cedar closet for awhile.  Please bear in mind it takes me about half of an afternoon to organize and do seasonal shifts with my clothes and shoes.  Then?  A week or more to deal with the fabric stash.  There are also a couple hundred bottles of flower essence mother stock in there and it's time for their twice-annual grooming with sea salt and a (grouse) feather duster.

A plan of how to spend the day kind of jumped out at me.   I didn't have to think too much, I just had to embrace the goal and stick with it.  I thought it was a little nutty in the "plan" department (especially since it involved another machine with a long history of going haywire during retro merc phases...) but I didn't shut out the impulse.  Instead I followed through on a series of "I should really" thoughts that fused together really well. 

I began simply - by sewing two stray rows to the top of a charm quilt that's been in such slow progress that I knew it would do me a world of good to get as far as I could with it today.  Because that's the kind of a day it was.  A push through the rubble and have something to show for it kinda day.  To that end, I pin basted the completed and freshly ironed top to some batting.  Side note:  Now I can stop wondering/worrying about how I'm going to divide this particular gigantic piece of batting.  Most of it's in the quilt and the rest is now, dare I say, cut down to manageable pieces.

Getting the quilt basted was as far as I planned to go - that's what I thought I would need as proof that I'd gotten over myself and into a new thing.  It felt like a real luxury to smooth out the batting and top on a wooden floor.   It won't be more than a few days before Jim brings the rugs back into the living room.  Today was, indeed, the perfect day to pin baste a full sized quilt!  Then, working one little just-see-how-it-goes step at a time, I wound up machine quilting the entire thing!   As many readers are aware I have an extreme love-hate relationship with sewing machines.  I have found the only really fool proof way for me to machine quilt in a way that's at least partially enjoyable for me (AND avoid severe hate/puckered fabric) is to quilt both sides separately. I know it's not what you are "supposed" to do but it really does work and ups the satisfaction quotient several times over. 



This top dates back to my charm square exchange days.   I put a lot of it together while I still lived in Boston.  When we moved here and I subsequently became too ill for projects and hobbies, this was something that got shoved aside many times over.  Every so often I move it from here to there, accompanied by thoughts such as "I should really get those last two rows sewn into place, at the very least. " This morning, I had a VERY SUDDEN AND POWERFUL urge to just get a move on with this specific thing.  I felt like it needed to be actualized and also realized the process would be more fulfilling for me than starting something completely from scratch and the scraps I recently cleaned off the floor. 

Since taking the documentation photos, I've selected the binding fabric and intend to make french bias binding sometime in the next few days.  I also pulled some fabrics for the back and hope I will have a chance to begin work on it tomorrow.  The picture is not great but it does show the basic look of the piece.  I've left the tumbler edges staggered.  That's always been the "official" challenge of this particular quilt - creating a uneven edging and getting familiar with how bias binding works to accomplish a smooth finish.  It's important for me to learn because  I have another all handsewn quilt in progress that has much sharper angles to the lines of the edges.



Behold the ubiquitous teal influence of the late 80's and early 90's!  If you exchanged charm squares with me back in the day, you may see some of your fabs once you click to enlarge the image.  The top was machine pieced and I remember being pleased at how well and easily the tumblers went together.  I would definitely use this pattern again though I would also work with a very different color combination.  I'd like this same larger size for fabrics with strong motifs and something smaller - by maybe a third? - for fabrics with a smaller scale and 'fluffier' density.

Now I'm off to appreciate the fact that I just made a blog post with pictures.